Can't write for tears

So we had to do it. Bena was put to sleep at around 5 pm today. She spent her day moving from place to place: the bed, the hearth, a chair. It was harder and harder watching her try to move herself around. It was the right thing to do - but, oh, so hard. Anyway, if there are typos, it's because I can't see what I'm doing right now.

She came into my life exactly 13 years ago, when she moved in to my house with her first person and Bert. I already had Max, who wasn't thrilled with the company. Bena immediately made her presence known, scoping out good spots to sleep and be with us, and she wouldn't hesitate to insinuate herself into my lap, even though Max had first claim.

Then her first person left in April 1997, leaving the four of us a quartet of bachelorettes. We were four girls, living all together, but we were all alone - til the one day when I met Elizabeth and she took all of us to her heart. In July of 1998 we moved to this house, and Bena was THRILLED! It had so many more places for her to claim as hers, and the great outdoors beckoned. She spent much of that summer and summers to follow scooting around in the woods on either side of us. She brought us gifts of shrews and birds. Then, when Max left us in 1999, Bena became Numero Uno and proclaimed me her personal lackey.

To list the sweet, adorable, idiosyncratic ways of the Ballerina-Princess-Warrior is more than I can do. She was a Happy Cat - even when momentarily pissed off. She never held a grudge. Just last month, when I was sick with the 'flu, she spent the whole time curled up beside me, purring away. This is why her loss is so, so hard.

Love your pets. Give them an extra cuddle tonight.